Hazaron Khwahishein Aisi

Warning: Only for people who enjoy "cheap and vile" humor
Ask anybody in my college..What is your heartiest desire.I bet my money on the answer,"more quality girls".(Assuming that anybody is a boy.Won't you ask a girl more charming things??)

Imagine a scenario,set somewhere in the future(I earnestly pray to the Almighty God to hasten that future before my graduation..All my friends will turn believers),where boys become a rare/endangered species in. I entreat you to stretch your imagination to the point where the sex ratio in my college is reversed..40 boys in a batch of 500(scale according to reservation and kiddo IITs under our "mentorship").


Imagine the life of an average boy.On the very first day,when the deans ask us to be magoda great engineers and not to go to finance,IIM or abroad build a great nation,a group of baffled boys sitting in solidarity,maybe holding hands,saheli types, in one corner of Convo.One of them is at ease,he knows some "dude" girl from his school/Kota days.An unfortunate guy gets late.He enters the hall and walks the most difficult 20 meters or so of his life,blushing under the scrutiny of a thousand lustful eyes.And there is no end to these petty,embarrassing incidents.

Imagine R2 and Ex-Hall during exams.Boys in demand bhai.Envious girls watching a lucky babe flirting"studying" with a hunk.(No relation to our coolhunk). The dumbest,weirdest,and magodas of today will be cozying up with ultra-hot chicks.A boy asks a gal for her classnotes and she's on cloud nine.It becomes the talk of her hostel.Girls swarm over Zanskar(or watever the girls will call it)  to see boys swimming in the pool.Even obscene comments wouldn't surprise me.
Obscenity brings me to the most cherished part of campus life(atleast for me) - hurling abuses and LAN.Wat would be the most common abuse in the campus??How would girls abuse each other?? I suppose casting reflection on a girl's relationship with his male family members. Baap something something..Bhai bla bla.(Still haven't figured out a good enough Hindi version).Out of nowhere,a girl calls another girl names.No big deal. Habitual stuff for them.Poor boys nearby can do nothing but blush with a faint and embarrassed smile.Boy's pics scattered all over the LAN-with folders like Husn ka Khazana,Jawaan Launde :P

And think how would Vindy look like then??A girly Khullar(even more irritating,with shriller voice),lady Bacchi(even filthier),female Akhilesh(even dumber) and Miss Thakkar(just imagine).
Hey guys.Don't lose heart.There is a silver lining to this dark cloud-Placements.Companies vie and die for guys.You're the man !!! What if for the first time in your college life.At the end of 4 years,you go out laughing with a top-notch job in your pockets.And maybe even more girls will hit on you in your job.

PS:1:Please exercise your imagination and suggest more such scenarios.
2.:The central idea of this post was adapted(a polite synonym for plagiarized) from an IITKGP boy..Due credits to him
3.To the thousand other nameless colleges that suffer the same plight..my heart goes out to you.I share your desperation and frustration.
4.Nothing in this blog shall be misinterpreted to mean that I am betraying my brotherhood of boys.You are awesome guys.